I got sober at 19 years old.

 

I didn’t yet realize I was drinking to cope with a toxic family—it felt like medicine for a problem I didn’t know I had. 

 

Getting sober was just the beginning.

Because when the numbing stopped, everything else came up.

 

The anxiety.

The pain.

The patterns.

 

So I reached for a new form of medicine, my eating disorder.

I was sober, and still abandoning myself.

 

In 2007, I entered treatment again, this time for a different beast. And it saved my life, again.

After getting sober and healing from my eating disorder, I officially became a cycle breaker.

And yet…..there was still more work to do.​

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The same unhealthy pattern of my alcoholism and eating disorder, followed me into romantic relationships.

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High-conflict. Walking on eggshells.
Convincing myself that if I just stayed long enough, loved hard enough, fixed enough… things would change.

They didn’t.

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Because the problem wasn’t just who I was choosing,
it was what I believed I had to tolerate to be loved.

Everything began to shift when I worked with a woman who taught me self-worth, healing, and most importantly, boundaries.

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As I began healing my toxic romantic relationship patterns, I saw how closely they resembled my family dynamics.

 

I had been gaslit for years, taught to distrust my feelings, dismiss my needs, and ignore boundary violations.

 

Until I stopped listening to the words and started paying attention to the actions.

 

After many attempts to communicate, set boundaries, and even pursue therapy with my narcissistic parent, I realized I had exhausted every option. In 2018, I made the painful decision to go no-contact.

 

It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.

And one of the most life-changing.

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I had finally stopped asking:

“How do I make this relationship work?”

 

And started asking:

“Why am I abandoning myself to keep it?”

 

Then I did the work that allowed me to finally choose myself.

Two more cycles broken.

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For over 15 years, I worked in behavioral health—

supporting individuals and families through addiction, eating disorders, and mental health crises.

 

I’ve sat with people in their darkest moments.

I’ve helped guide them through life-altering change.

 

But the most powerful work I’ve ever done?

 

Was my own.

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As a Boundaries Coach, and cycle breaker I help people:

   •   break unhealthy cycles

   •   unlearn people-pleasing and over-functioning

   •   rebuild self-trust

   •   create relationships that are actually safe, mutual, and aligned

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Today, I don’t abandon myself to be loved.

I am deeply loved by my husband, my chosen family and my chihuahuas.

 

Today,

I trust myself.

I use my voice.

I choose who has access to me.

 

And I help others do the same.

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If you’re ready to stop shrinking and start living in alignment with who you actually are—this is your moment.